The Last Day of Year 2009

Today being the last day of year 2009, I figure I should have a reflection of some sort to commemorate this very important year.

First, release of the O level results resulted in me finding the calling of my life - The Service Industry. I can vividly remember the day when the results were released, which was the same day I was enrolled into Shatec! Since then, my life seems to have been changed completely. I now have a clear view of how I want my future to be. I want to complete university by 23 years old. Buy my own car by 25 years old, own an apartment by 30 years old. It is achieveable, as long as I work for it - and I will. The sole purpose of my existence, - My Dream.

Second, started and ended a relationship. A cheating boyfriend - Probably the reason I lost one of my close friend. Moved on swiftly, proved to be a good choice. However, it was also him who showed me what a boyfriend is. Not someone whom I must submit to, but someone who love and care and most importantly - respect, me. I have since decided on what type of guys I want to go along with, and I wouldn't settle for anything less than that.

Third, Attachment. Attachment has been a really enriching experience for me. I've learnt so much from the attachment period at Coffee Club Terminal 3. I have also met many really nice people, who inspired me to become like them, especially Outlet Manager Mr Sazeli. He have taught me so much, not just on work but also on life. If I have to compress all that he have taught me into a single sentence, it would undoubtedly be the most important factor of a good service provider - First Good Staff Service, Before Good Guest Service. I've also met E, who has never stopped being so sweet to me though I've been really mean before. E, the graffti you made on my lift wall is still there and it never fails to make me smile. Thanks for always being there!

Forth, Bukit Batok 四根草! Thanks you all so much for never failing to be there. Sure we had our share of disagreements and arguments, but I'm sure deep down inside, we know we will last forever. Thanks you all so much for making my birthday this year such a memorable one, it was really one of the best birthday celebrations I have had! And ZharBor Yap, I never knew we had so much so much in common and that we really do think alike! I am extremely happy that we shared so much laughters together! Thankyou BKBT4Grass for making my year a happy one!

Fifth, my newly renovated room! All thanks to my mum, The Woman.
As I grow older, I have learn to appreciated her in ways I did not realise when I was younger. She - My Superwoman - has immensely influenced my life. Though we did not talk about it, I really do wish she will find true happiness soon because afterall, what matters most is that she's happy. Once again, Thanks Mummy.

Lastly, the reason why I've decided to stay home for a quiet new year countdown this year. As the clock strike 12am today, I do not want to be among the roaring crowds, dancing away with the spectacular fireworks towards another exciting year. As the clock strike 12am today, I want to be at home in my comfort zone, to memorialise, to bethink, to imprint and to perpetuate in my memory every single thing that we have been through - right from the beginning when he gave me a box of ferrero till when he told me he is attached, etc etc. Because when the clock strike 12am today, it would mark the end of my 4 years of emotional struggle with Him. Yes, Him - My Dearest - whom I have been through so much with - Happiness, Heartbreaks, etc. 4 long years, that's how long we have been emotionally attached. So much that it's no longer love anymore, love has since cooled into what many married couple is experiencing - Habit, Kinship, etc. I remember everything right from the beginning, up till the very end. Perhaps I knew what I wanted all along, only that I didn't want to lose you as a friend. I was more aware than anyone that things would never be the same again, because we aren't the same person as we used to be when we were first together. Kitty and Tiger belongs in the past, and they will never come back again. I know, because I tried countless times to bring them back. Of course I am upset now, but I'm really glad you are happy and that you are finally moving on.

"Have you ever felt like you had lead your life for someone else in the way they liked it, only to realise that when they're finally gone, your life is but haunting remains of the past?", I asked myself.

Everything about us has been done according to your way. It's all what you wanted, this and that. It's over, a year ago actually, and I will stop thinking about you anymore. Everything about us shall go into that box of ours, along with everything else about us. Friends, we shall just be, from this very moment.

I wish you true happiness, right from the truest me within bottom of my heart.

And I wish myself all the best of luck in achieving my dreams!

Let 2010 be a brand new start, for myself. Cheers!

4 Steps To Mending A Broken Heart

With getting over someone, you have to be real.  Freedom is to continue without focusing on the past.  We can neither erase nor avoid the inevitable sorrow.  It’s a part of life.  We must endure no matter how impossible it seems.  Walk through to become a stronger person.

Never let the pain exist in vain.  That someone is the reason you’re in pain, but it still doesn’t take away your responsibility.  You’re worth every effort.  Deal with it, not because you can or should, but that you have to.

Realize that even if you’re seemingly denied of it, closure comes from within.  When you free yourself from the boundaries of relying on external sources, then and only then will you become more.  To understand what it means to believe in yourself, acknowledging that you’re capable.

It’s hard, but possibility outweighs the impossible.  It’s about doing whatever it takes, being resourceful with everything you have; the strength and courage you conjure.  Love yourself more because the choice is always yours.

(http://dearricky.xanga.com/718674473/4-steps-to-mending-a-broken-heart)